Let {it} go

I have trouble relinquishing control. There, I said it. It is a common issue with many of us my-kid-has-extra-stuff-going-on club mums. We usually only admit it to each other. But here I am…out and…well out.

I have had a tough day. An ugly crying while driving kind of day. Missy is going into respite next week. “Great”, you may think. It is…and it isn’t. I certainly need a break. It has been a year since I had more than an evening off duty. But I find it so very hard to put her into care. Then, as I nearly had my head around it, plans were changed for me. It was for a good reason but that made little difference to my reaction. Cue red, wet eyes and sniffling nose.

The princess is a complicated creature. She has multiple medications, a feeding schedule to follow, equipment to be familiar with and some funky things to watch out for. And then there is her lack of voice. Care is made more challenging for a child who cannot speak up and say “I’m hungry” or “I usually have a story before bed”. So I worry.

We will do it. We both need to. I will go to plan B and trust that all will be well. And she, the brave one, will have a lovely time.

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2 thoughts on “Let {it} go

  1. It’s difficult to give up control, particularly when those of us who live with disability as a constant lack control over so many things. I remain forever grateful my parents did not try to do it all on their own and let me experience being away from them as a child. You are helping her as well as yourself by taking a respite.

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